MEET ASHA

LOOK at this tiny little girl! You wouldn't think she would be able to lift a pair of scissors but guess what? She can. She is my most favorite hairdresser in all the world. You should totes hit her up and get her to sex up your locks. Contact Fatty Arbuckles Hair Artistry in East Perth on (08) 9218 9559 and ask for Asha. Tell them I sent you. And furthermore...this is not a sponsored post. This girl knows her way around a head!

DON'T YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN...(6)

...you take your car through the car wash and you forget to close the back window?

...the guy you've just had rumpy with, leaves his used condom on the floor? Manners costs nothing people.

...all you want to do is sit down at the hairdresser, read the 3 year old Vogue and sip a latte, but all your stylist wants to do is tell you about her boyfriend or what her new bad tattoo means? You just snip some barnet sweetheart, OK?

...you drive perfectly well on your own, but when there are 3 loud mouths in the vehicle you suddenly make a squillion mistakes?

...musicians that are LEGENDS start plugging their albums on talk shows and tell you how you can even download it into a ring tone? John Lennon would be rolling in his grave Ringo Star! You muppet.

...your bra straps keep falling down? It's up there with flies as the most consistently annoying thing ever.

...you live outside of Western Australia and you can't come to my amazillion party this weekend?

kisses xx

DON'T YOU JUST HATE IT WHEN... (2)

...you are sitting in economy class on an aeroplane during a long haul flight and you are packed in tighter than a ducks asshole, and they show adverts for first class on your little tiny TV screen? Um...thanks for that. We didn't realise that first class meant that your chair could recline all the way back into a bed...oh and you can have a massage too? Oh wow, AND you get complimentary slippers and pyjamas? GEE WHIZZ, if we'd have known THAT we would have spent that extra $20 000! I never say this word but 'c*nts'.

...you wake up in the morning feeling pretty perky. You feel amazing in your outfit and you apply your make up like you never have before, you SWEAR everything just fell into place. Then you run into nobody, and nothing exciting happens during the entire. bloody. day? - what a frikkin waste.

...when it starts pissing it down as soon as you leave the hairdressers and your $100 haircut and blowdry is gone, and you are left looking like Diana Ross on crack?

...scene kids start to 'love' your favourite band? What the hell do they know?

...when you walk into a party or gathering and say a general 'hi' to everybody and nobody responds and just kinda gives you a half smile. And then they all watch you look for somewhere to sit and get comfortable and carry on with whatever boring, beige conversation they were having?

...when you give a friend a present that you spent alot of money on and knew she would like, and when she opens it in front of said crowd she doesnt get too excited and just kind of murmers her gratitude...um, you'll get poo wrapped in brown paper next time if you're not bloody careful.

Yes. I'm annoyed.