Saturday, February 26, 2011

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway HOMME Part 26



SOME DECORUM WHEN TAKING A LEAK IN PUBLIC PLEASE! - At a party a few nights ago a dude who was winning at life stumbled over, whipped his little pecker out and started to pee in a corner right next to us  - the fumes from his 90% beer urine blended with the balmy summer night and it totally aroused us. Then he walked over and tried to kiss my friend. She declined. He couldn't understand why! Then he sat down on the arm of the chair and it broke. All of us started fighting over who was gonna have his children.

UM, I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW TO SAY THIS ... - But putting your flaccid penis in our mouth to help make it hard just makes us dry as a bone. There. That wasn't that hard actually! *pun intended*

PLEASE DON'T OVER USE THE SMILEY FACE IN TEXT MESSAGES - It's gay.

EASY WITH THE WORD 'SLUT' - OK maaaaaaaybe in bed once or twice. But just because we played with our hair when we spoke to another dude or decided to maybe lift the hemline on our skirt a bit, does NOT give you the right to just throw the word 'slut' around. Take your Chris Brown attitude and check yourself.  Dickhead.

Phew. I'm angry today.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

easy with the word "gay"

you're not in highschool and you probably don't want to be seen as homophobic

Obnoxious Owl said...

its all in context 'anon' - you know that :)

Amberly said...

Haha wow spot on!

Patrick said...

haha gay i totally use smiley faces in text messages but i'm usually being a total dick wad. And anon using the word "gay" is defiantly a generational thing my brothers use it all the time and are far from homophobic but i can see your point. Although i do think that as a society we have become too P.C. especially the gay community i think it depends on the context in which it is used and the way it's delivered.

Ruby Velour said...

I hate the word "slut" more than anything! It can be sexy when said during some sexy times with someone you love and trust because it's very naughty, but any other time is not appropriate, ever!

Obnoxious Owl said...

innit!!