Take my advice...I don't use it anyway SPECIAL EDITION: My current beauty essentials Pt 4

Gather round ladies, Mama Owl gwaan tell ya what I use on my mug. Fuck, I'm no 'beauty guru' (beauty guru's don't say fuck for one thing) but I know what I like and I am just a little bottomless pit of opinion, so HEAR ME NOW!!

 This here is MAC's gel eyeliner pot or better known in the 'bizz' as FLUIDLINE and they call it fluid because it is. Fluid and smooth and long lasting.  Not only on your lid, but this little demon lasts a bloody age. I've had this pot near on 5 months now and shit's still just giving and giving.   You need an angled brush....exhibit A...

I have the MAC one as well. I mean, I was buying it from there and stuff and they gotta do their little upsells and flog you all the necessary apparatus. It's not like you can use this shit with your finger, the brush is uber essential, you'd think they'd throw in hey?!  Anyhow, it's not that expensive this eyeliner stuff, it's only like 40 bucks, the brush ain't too far off that.  But really, unlike boys, brushes last relatively forever if you take care of them. I tell ya, that little angled shape on this brush combined with that pot of black magic will give your eyes wings that'll make ya fly like Air Jamaica girl.

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MEET ASHA

LOOK at this tiny little girl! You wouldn't think she would be able to lift a pair of scissors but guess what? She can. She is my most favorite hairdresser in all the world. You should totes hit her up and get her to sex up your locks. Contact Fatty Arbuckles Hair Artistry in East Perth on (08) 9218 9559 and ask for Asha. Tell them I sent you. And furthermore...this is not a sponsored post. This girl knows her way around a head!

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway HOMME Part 18

FOR BOYS ONLY

OWN AT LEAST ONE SUIT - It needs to fit perfectly and make you look like James Bond. It needs to not be polyester.  Your mum shouldn't have helped you buy it when you were 17 for your year 12 ball.  The sleeves should not cover knuckles.  A velvet suit can be hot...jus sayin.

IF YOU PUT YOUR FINGER IN OUR BUM AND DON'T SPIT ON IT OR LUBE IT UP SOMEHOW, IT WILL HURT - You bastard.

MAKE IT FEEL AS IF YOU ARE GOING TO RAPE US - But then don't. I'm not saying rape is cool, rape is bad. But to most girls, the feeling of danger is a total turn on.  If you are a girl, and you have been genuinely raped and you're reading this, I'm sorry.  But I'm not deleting this, because its the truth. 

STOP DESCRIBING GIRLS AS 'STARFISH' WHEN THEY JUST 'LAY THERE' - Ever thought that you may be a 'dud fuck' arsehole?  She was prolly just bored.

IF YOU READ A TEXT MESSAGE, AND THEN QUICKLY PUT YOUR PHONE IN YOUR POCKET AND DART A LOOK OVER AT YOUR MISSUS, SHE WILL BE SUSPICIOUS - Stop being a wanker and tryna turn your girl into some kinda psycho just so that you a) feel needed and b) can get into a 'who has the most psycho girlfriend' debate with your friends.  We're onto you.......

IF YOU HAVE LONG HAIR, WEARING IT IN A BUN IS NOT A GOOD LOOK - Who do you think you are?  Mr Miyagi some shit?

Love you x 

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway SPECIAL EDITION: Owl's Beauty Essentials Pt 2 - For the thrifty

So the last beauty post I did actually ended up becoming some kind of Bible to some of you guys.  I had soooo much feedback which is great because now I know you all actually take heed of the shit I say but at the same time kinda freaks me out 'cause now you are all jacking my swagger!  I kid...jack all you want, it's pretty fly. 

Some of the response was that some of you liked the post, but requested I do another with some of the less pricier stuff I use.  To be honest owlies, I do my scrimping on clothes...like buying 2nd hand/Ebay etc, and I flash the cash on the beauty.  'Cause really, this stuff is an investment, however, there are some increddy products out there that won't rape your bank account, and they be ...

Revlon Top Coat.  Right, you know I'm attached to my acrylics like shit to a shoe. I enjoy them because I like having nice hands and I love nail varnish, but I HATE chipped varnish...there ain't no 'grunge chic' Ashley Olsen type shit happening up in here!  Varnish hardly ever chips when you have acrylics, it just adheres itself way better than to your OG's.  But it does go dull every few days, which is why I lacquer up my claws with this baby.  It's great for keeping your nails shiny and it dries super fast.  I've been known to shine up my talons at the traffic lights from time to time...for example.  HEY! Who the fuck are you? Constable traffic man? This is the greatest top coat I've ever tried and it's great even if you don't have fake nails.  Plus its only like 6 dolla.

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I like my shit rose tinted

The Inspo...

The Result...

Now if someone could just photoshop the fucking bags under my eyes, I'd be sweet.

Laterz x

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway SPECIAL EDITION: Owl's Beauty Essentials

Yup, I'm about to share with you my most fave products that ever lived - and trust me, I've done the legwork. I have such an obsession with make-up, skincare and fragrance because it is THE best treat you could possibly buy yourself. It's sole purpose in life is to make you a 'lil more bangin. (aw thanks guys!) Clothes just make you feel fat and food MAKES you fat so beauty products is where it's at! I'm not getting paid to promote any of these (although if anyone from these companies reads this post and want to throw some my way, gimme a holla!) So with no further delay, I give you: Owls Beauty Essentials.

I am a tan junkie. And it's no secret (as much as I try to keep it as one) that I hit the solarium from time to time. Yeah I know, naughty naughty but whatevs. Luckily I'm blessed with olive skin because of my dads Portuguese heritage, but alas, I have my mothers genetics too...and she is a ginger ninja (a nice one) which makes me pretty prone to freckles. St Tropez is a mother fuckin life saver. If I'm feeling ill, fat or gross I slap this brown miracle worker all over my bod. Hey! When I self hate I self tan! It is by far the best brand out there. I've used others and yeah they're OK but I always end up back with 'ol faithful. It looks the most natural, like I never get a 'Are you wearing fake tan?' question, I just get told 'You're looking well' which = win! Plus it doesn't have the minging chemical smell most of them have. Me and St Tropez are gonna be getting emotional together this winter, I can tell ya that RIGHT now.

Darphin skincare is the most amazing thing I've ever used ever, like EVER! Seriously. Years ago when I was living in London a friend got me onto this French marvel (of course it's French), I was feeling run down and having a skin crisis and she got me a couple of samples of the entire range. Within like 3 days my skin looked like a baby's ass after a warm bath. Increds! It's all natural and smells beeeeyewtiful. I seriously wanna root this product hey. It's a bit pricey, I ain't gonna lie, which is why I will admit, it's not always a bathroom staple for me. But when my bank account isn't undergoing rape or my skin looks like a bad day in Bosnia, I get my claws into this baby and my GOD it works. If you can't afford the whole range, get hold of the Cleansing Aromatic Emulsion - it's pretty much all you'll need. You can buy it from Mecca here in Aus, and Space NK, Harrods and Fenwick in London. To find out where to get it in your neck of the woods, peep it here.

I moisturise my entire self from head to toe after every shower. And I'm a sucker for the Body Shops Body Butters...Brazil Nut in particular. It smells so 'effin delicious I have to sometimes stop myself from licking my arm! Grapefruit is my fave in summer but I really am addicted to it's nuttier mate. It's fairly inexpensive and pretty much amazing. The only thing is though, is that it gets under my acrylics because it's in a tub. But that's my own fault for wanting hooker nails.

I looooooooove lipsticks. They are an as important accessory to my wardrobe as my jewellery. I have like 812 all up - OK, I only have 11, but you get my point. Now I like to wear it daily, and whilst I enjoy bright colours (I even have blue lippy) it's not exactly practical to be rocking rainbow lips everyday of the week. So my fave staple lip smacker is by my old friend M.A.C and the colour is 'BOMBSHELL'. I reapply this bad boy about 20 times a day and therefore go through alot of them. (Did you know if you take 6 empty M.A.C containers to the counter, they give you a free lipstick of your choice? It's all about recycling honey - true story) My favourite daily make-up look is bronzed skin, defined eyes, rosy cheeks and plump pink lips (oh get your mind outta the gutter). This colour helps me achieve said look so if that's your thing too, give it a whirl.

Now I didn't want this post to be all about M.A.C - especially as I do use alot of it. Hey it can't be helped, my younger sis is a M.A.C make-up artist so I get alotta loot, what can ya do? Anyhow, I wear liquid eyeliner every.single.day. And I have done for about 10 years. No joke. I have tried all of them. I really have. Even the cheap 2 quid one's from H&M. Therefore I can categorically say that M.A.C's liquid eyeliner is the bomb diggidy. It lasts for aaaaaaages and it's precise. It has a texter like tip so it makes it hella easy to apply, and it comes in quite a few colours. Black liquid eyeliner does to the face what a Wonderbra does to your tits. Invest in this owlettes.

Ah yes, an obvious next choice after the liquid liner is the hall of fame red lippy. EVERYONE suits red lipstick. Ya just gotta find the right shade. An absolute winner is NARS lipstick in JUNGLE RED. It is seriously Gwen Stefani worthy. I am yet to see anyone who doesn't suit this colour red. Don't say you can't wear red because you have thin lips either...get all Kirsten Dunst about it and embrace the crimson honey. Red on the lips is classic, yet makes you look instantly contemporary - so you're going out and you are just wearing jeans, Converse and a white tshirt? Slap some red on your kisser and you'll look instantly fuckable. Hit up NARS in general though, it's a pretty radical brand. A few honourable mentions that I carry in my lipstick wardrobe as far as red hue's go is LADY DANGER by M-A-C (sozz) and RETROFURIST OPAQUE LIPSTICK by LIMECRIME - pretty much the colour Snow White woulda worn if she wasn't off shagging dwarfs.

As many of you are aware, I am pretty much married to my acrylic nails. Unfortunately they aren't too kind to your own nails or cuticles. Which is why I always make sure I apply hand cream throughout the day and especially at night before zzzzz. CLARINS HAND AND NAIL TREATMENT is bloody LUSH. It smells like heaven and makes your hands feel like 30 bucks. (That's how much it costs) - so worth it though! This shit is so addictive it's like hand cream crack.

When my folks were handing out eyelashes, I'm pretty sure my sisters got dibs on it 'cause it's almost as if I was given pubic hair by accident. For seez, my eyelashes are ridiculous - and not in a good way. Which is why I need all the help I can get! Eyelash curlers save my life. Hmmm, that sounded a bit dramatic, but Imma trying to get a point across 'ere! If your eyes are your window to your soul, then don't be skimping on them! shu uemura is pretty much the Rolls Royce of eyelash pimpers. Look into it.

Alright so just one more M.A.C thing OK? Ya know like how I was saying I like bronzed skin, pink lips, defined eyes and rosy cheeks? Well. look no further than this shade of amazing. The colour is called DOLLYMIX by (yawn) M.A.C and it makes my privates tingle. I love this colour hey. It may be a lil too bright for fairer girls but if you are feeling brave, give it a try. I usually prefer creamier blushes, but I really do love this little baby. You just gotta watch you don't pile too much on and end up looking like you applied your make up with a spatula. Ya get me?

Hands up who is addicted to lip balm??!!! Yeah man, it's mental. My lips get dryer than a nun's fanny if I don't apply some lubrication on the regular. CARMEX is THE BEST. Plus I love how it comes in a little yellow tin, it kinda gives it that retro feel. I first got hooked on this when I worked for Urban Outfitters, and we used to sell around 2000 of these suckers in a week! We kept them in cookie jars throughout the stores and they constantly needed refilling. You can get it at most pharmacies and I seriously suggest you do. I bet you're an addict after the first time you try it. Keep them kissers kissable ladies!

When I was a teenager I used to put so much foundation on, ya coulda scraped some off my jaw line and used it to fill the cracks in a wall! MAINLY because I fucking HATED my freckles. Now as I get a little, ehrm, older I have embraced the freckling and prefer lighter coverage and realised that as far as foundation goes...you get what you pay for. End of. GIORGIO ARMANI FACE FABRIC is actually what the name says. Your face feels like it's been swathed in a piece of beige silk. It is seriously in.sane. It covers just enough so you look relatively flawless (more flawless than you already are awww) but kinda gives the impression you aren't wearing any. Sound too good to be true? It ain't.

I am one of them girls that has to wash her hair daily. For some unGodly reason my hair is getting finer as I creep into my 30's, which is a pain in the tits, 'cause I HATE HATE fucking HATE flat hair. Then I came across this bad ass. And I'm glad I did, because it's basically the dictator of hair products, and my hair listens to everything it tells it to do. KMS HAIRPLAY is a dry wax in spray form that won't leave your hair feeling gunky and just kinda more manageable, especially after you've just washed it and it has the texture of bum fluff. I heart this very much.

Fragrance I think should be personal. Your signature scent should be kept under wraps and lie if someone asks you what you're wearing. (FYI, if your signature scent is a celeb fragrance...we need to talk). So I am keeping my lip zipped as far as my sig scent is concerned, but what I WILL share with you is what I wear on the not so special occasions, like normal days at work, the movies, whatever. I always get asked about this and it's LAURA MERCIER in CREME BRULEE. Obviously a scent named after a dessert is gonna be tasty. WARNING: You will get asked at least 3 times a day what you're wearing if you indulge in this.

I have advised you in countless previous posts to remove your make-up before you hit the pillow. Easier said than done when you roll in at 4am looking like something that lines the bottom of a birdcage and you would rather stick a fork in your eye than get involved in any sort of beauty regime. Face wipes is proof that God is a woman. NIVEA in my opinion are ze best. It's slightly creamier than other brands, and better at removing eye make-up without dragging the fine skin under the eye. You should be keeping this in your bag as well in case you spend the night in the company of a male, and you wake up the next morning resembling Pamela the Panda. Just run these under your eye and BAM! the dirt is gone. They are also great for when you just wanna refresh your make-up before you go out and haven't got time to shower. Just wipe this over your mug then reapply. God, it's scary how much you lot need me.

The two best things for a glowing complexion is loads of water and loads of sex. But if like me you are not indulging in the latter, you may wanna get your paws onto BENEFIT HIGH BEAM. I bloody love BENEFIT. The packaging is adorable (I am easily sucked in by a good container) and whilst it may look a bit 'novelty' it defs does the job. Just run this glorious stuff along your cheekbones and brow bones before (or after actually) your foundation and you will look like you've just had the lay of your life. Hey! Some of us have to make do with material things.

You are never to young to start using eye cream. Heck I wish I started when I was a toddler (gee thanks Mum). But I didn't so therefore I spend mega $$$ on it now. ELIZABETH ARDEN PREVAGE is literally like skin poly filler. It's almost as though you see the skin tighten right in front of your um, eyes. I realise that many probs couldn't afford this (me included) but I wanted to tell you about the best I have ever come across and seriously, this is it. It's supposed to have the foreskins of circumcised infants as one of it's ingredients (er....OK) so mabes that's why it's a squillion dollars. But man oh man, I'd bath in this shit if I could...baby penis and all.

Ok so it wasn't 10...more like 16. Whatever man, I can do what I want. Lemme know if any of you use any of these, and if you don't and you give any a try, tell a girl what you think. How dope is it being a lady hey? Fuck being a man. If they are fugly, there ain't much homeboy can do about it.

Love ya xx

'The Obnoxious Owl Experience' - Week Two

It's been a bit of a hectic week to be honest. Shits been going down in my hometown South Africa (stay tuned for an entire post dedicated to that...Owl's gonna get real) and even though I've been pretty busy with work and recreation, it's been on my mind the entire time. Anyhow...here it is...my week in pics.

Sooooooooo it was Easter. And I was on a fooking diet - which meant nada chocolate bunnies and hot cross sex buns - which is only like my most favourite bun! Therefore I requested that the bunny is not to deliver any confectionery this year. I DID however receive this bad boy from my staff...

Yes. Yes that is a chocolate Mr Potato head WITH detachable body parts. There is no temptation to tuck into this as it blatantly needs to stay in the box and look rad, innit? Said diet has kinda driven me into a bit of a spending spree (which is bad bad bad, because I leave for the UK in 8 weeks for Glastonbury and I also don't really need anything) HOWEVER...lookie at this silver bag I picked up for 2 dolla from CottonOn...

Voila! A cassette decorated goon bag! You could also probs roast a chicken in it too. I mainly use it for work to lug around my HUGE A4 diary and other such 'tings.

Now I am a self proclaimed Nike girl, Air Max to be specific (I like the elevation) but Dee from Winifred & Bance sent me a Facebook message informing me that she just got a 1980's Adidas Trackie Top in that was 'so me' (it's garish and obnoxious - she has a point) so obvs I had to buy it. I am not one to go around mixing brands so I needed some kicks to go with it, thus forcing me to cop these babies...

Oh yeah, that's what I'm talking about! Truth be told, I think I used the top as an excuse 'cause I've kinda had my eye on these for a while. That retro Adidas jacket would look waaaay better with heels and hoop earrings anyway. What's a girl to do? I'll tell you what's she to do, she's to impulse purchase THESE beauty's...

Oh God. Tell me you ain't salivating right about now. I picked them up thinking they'd be about $400 but they were just a measly 170 bucks! That's like nothing! OK OK, I shouldn't be spending when I have an international trip on the horizon but imagine me hanging out with Kate Moss at Glasto wearing these fuckers! Exactly. It's an investment.

In other news - I dyed my hair black this week and had another fringe trim. I went all edgy and had it cut on a slant like so...

I have had more fringe trims in my life than I've had hot showers. Because basically, I've had the same 'effin hair cut since I was 5 years old. Exhibit A...

Jesus. I already had the 'myspace face' mastered at that age! But see? Same hair! Hey man, if it ain't broke, you know the rest.

So new hair, new clothes and a trimmer figure (the diet paid off 'cause I lost 9kg's! kaaaching!) I took my ass out on Saturday and landed up at a house party in the city. Ran into a few lad's from Last Chance and ended up getting tagged by one of their Danish mates. Nice choice of colour bruv!

It says 'NAME' 'cause that what he writes. I think it's kinda clever. It would have been more exciting if the pen used was of the more fleshier variety *sigh* Whatevs.

I woke up Sunday morning, cleaned my chest and headed out with the fam to Perth Zoo for my sisters birthday. Highlight of the day was the elephants having a bath...

(Errr..this picture doesn't really show much)...and lunch at JUS BURGERS afterwards (yes for those in the know, it is a Sowf Efrican restaurant) where I wolfed down a Chicken Pesto Mozzarella food angel...

Sozz diet :(

Not only are their burgers arguably the best in Perth but they had a nice wall for me to look at to!

Well that's about it really. This post is probs about an 11 out of 10 for narcissism, but I ain't gonna lie, I LOVE checking out other peeps photos, so I'm sure someone will find pleasure in these. Or at least it'll take up 2 minutes of your life while you're waiting for the kettle to boil. Speaking of which - Imma go have a brew right now.

So God bless and good night owlettes x

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway HOMME Part 10

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Take my advice...I don't use it anyway. Part treize

LAUGHING AT BIG ISSUE SELLERS IS JUST NOT COOL - In any shape or form. OK, SOMETIMES they say 'Big Issue' a bit funny, and yes it can be amusing but I actually saw two little teenage dregs of human pointing and laughing at an old man trying to sell this bloody magazine. Jesus, it's making me angry just typing this. I hope that they end up in the same position but instead of someone just laughing and pointing, I hope they get pissed on.

YOU REALLY DO NEED TO WAIT FOR YOUR HAIR TO DRY BEFORE YOU STRAIGHTEN IT - That sizzling sound ain't good for your barnet sugar. You are burning it. Not drying it. This is why half of those plastic girls with poker straight burnt hair look like they have roadkill on their heads. Your hair should sway and blow in the breeze, not stay dead still on your head like a run over squirrel.

SPEND A FAIR AMOUNT ON A GOOD HAIRCUT - Get it right the first time, then go to the cheaper places for maintenance. Your hair is the curtains and your face is the window. Everyone comments on the curtains before they look out the window. You get me?

IF YOU DON'T LET HIM HANG OUT WITH THE BOYS, THE BOYS WILL TRY TO ELIMINATE YOU - Seriously. The male bond is a strange thing, but they love it, so do not try to destroy it. If you become the 'bitch girlfriend' of a friend who 'used to be so much fun until he met blah blah' then they will whittle you down until he either dumps you, or you just end up feeling bullied. Make an effort with them, yeah some of them will be annoying and others may even hit on you...but if you love your man, you will need to understand that he loves his friends - even if you would rather stick a fork in your eye than play nice...just let them be.

IF YOU ARE A SIZE 14 OR WEIGH MORE THAN 70KG YOU CANNOT WEAR SPANDEX, SHORT TIGHT SKIRTS OR MIDRIFF TOPS - Look darling, I'm not even saying that you are fat. But you aren't Twiggy either and whilst this may look good on your friend, sadly, it does nothing for you. Your skinnier companions may be dying to wear those corset style dresses or even fill a C cup, but that ain't gonna happen neither. I've said this before, dress to hide your flaws and show off your assets. I saw a girl in a dress tonight that looked like someone tried to stick a stamp onto a watermelon.

IN THIS LIFE, YOU GET 'ENERGY PROVIDERS' OR 'ENERGY DRAINERS' - There will always be someone waiting in the wings to shit on your parade. You may think that someone who praises you all the time and strokes your ego is a energy provider, but you would be thinking wrong. These are people pleasers. And what people pleasers do, is they tell you how everything you do is just wonderful, even when it is bad for you, therefore you will drown in your own wrong doings that were coaxed on by a wolf in energy providers clothing. Now an energy provider will be there for you when you need them...not by carrying you and doing if for you, but by being your training wheels on the bike of life that you are learning to ride yourself. An energy provider will laugh and celebrate in your triumphs and tell you when you are being an asshole in the nicest way possible. Basically, they want to see you be the best you can be. Now go and sort through the people you surround yourself with and carefully divide the weak from the strength, the men from the boys, the sweet from the sour. The Lyndsay Lohans of this life need to do what they do best, and suck their parents dry. Not you.

You know it makes sense x

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway. Part sept

ANY GARMENT MADE OUT OF POLYESTER STRETCH SATIN SCREAMS TACKY - Come now girls. Unless you are a stripper named Cookie, Candy or any other kind of confectionery this is not a good idea. Nothing good can come of it. Very rarely are there items of clothing made out of this ghastly fabric that make the cut. It's clingy in all the wrong places, it runs, it pulls, the hemline is almost always uneven and the big word here is POLYESTER. Not chic honey.

IT'S ONE THING TO BE INSPIRED BUT IT'S QUITE ANOTHER TO BE A COPY CAT - OK, so you have a mate whose style, boyfriend, bedspread and general lifestyle you admire. That's cool. So get a boyfriend of your own who is equally as lovely instead of making a play for hers, be just as inventive in your interior decorating choices instead of finding out the make and style of what she has and go and buy the exact same one. She might look wondrous in that purple leather miniskirt, however if your legs look like tree stumps you may want to rethink the mini skirt and instead be inspired by her ability to dress according to her best attributes. I swear we've all had a friend that slowly started sounding and dressing like us and batted her copy cat eyelashes at our man. DON'T BE THAT GIRL. Ever watched 'Single White Female'?

PLEASE DO NOT ENCOURAGE NIPPLE TUNING - Look ladies, when you make love and such with a man, you are taking on a responsibility. This responsibility is to nurture and direct him towards becoming a better lover. If they tune your nipples like they are trying to get 92.5FM and you don't tell them it does not feel good they will think you fucking love it and continue the trend with another unlucky female. Don't pretend to enjoy it - you ain't doing them or us a favor, just softly nudge them in the right direction. And it doesn't stop at 'nipple tuning'...there is bad kissing, squeezing your tits like they are stress balls (listen dickheads, they are actually attached OK?), slobbering in your ear (it's happened), one night stands expecting the works when clearly it's just drive through and not a three course damn meal and using teeth in any sort of way. Please girls, once you're done with them, make sure they are well trained and enlightened in the art of sexy time.

DO NOT TRY TO CUT YOUR OWN FRINGE - It just never works out. You end up looking special needs. Most hairdressing salons don't charge for a fringe trim anyway, so there's no frikkin excuse you lazy girl.

SPLIT THE BILL - Geez you cheap arseholes, come now....so their chicken parmagana was like $5 more expensive than your garden salad....who fucking cares?! If you couldn't afford to go out for dinner then you shouldn't have accepted the invitation. And don't sit around waiting for your $1.75 change either, give the hard working waiter a tip God dammit! Do you want him to rub your steak between his ass next time? Well, DO YOU? This does not apply if the dinner was a date however, especially a first date and ESPECIALLY if he asked you out, then he should definitely pick up the tab. But if you asked him out well then obviously you should be the one reaching for your wallet and don't be expecting him to pay every time either. A certain amount of woo is necessary from the male, but there does come a time when the lady needs to rise up and pay her blinking way. This ain't the 50's darling, however fabulous that era may have been.

God speed xx