Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway Part quatre-vingts



STOP GOING OUT WITH WET HAIR! - You will catch pneumonia and die. Also, you look 'unkept' and 'pedestrian' ... which is worse than dying.

DO NOT SHAVE BETWEEN WAXING - Unless of course you hate yourself.

APPARENTLY, BOYS KNOW ABOUT 'BOOB SWEAT' - Like if you are bigger than a B Cup, and you sweat under dem titties.  I can't actually believe that a male brought this to my attention and that I should touch on it. So here I am...touching on it.  THIS is why I'm letting a few boys guest blog for me over the coming weeks...they obvs know more than we realize.  This is why we should kill them.

POLYESTER KNICKERS WILL GIVE YOU THRUSH - Yes that's yeast in your vagina baby. You are walking around with a hot box and it needs to breathe.  You don't want your genitals to be a science project. Ew...genitals is such a gross word.

HATERS ARE GONNA HATE, LET THEM! - Spend less time worrying about those that hate you and invest more time into those that don't. Keep good people close and the rest don't matter sugar. Say it with me, 'Love you haters!'

"IS IT IN YET?" - It's just not a nice thing to say. You might just have a wide set vagina. Also, don't ever say, 'Where is it?' 'cause it might just be caught in the little flap in their Y fronts...ehrm.

BEETROOT, ROCKET AND FETA SALAD - It's the future.

5 comments:

aDeLiNe said...

'Love you haters!'

Shinygirl said...

Suggests: roast baby beetroot, rocket, grilled haloumi and pumpkin seeds? I think I could live off it.

tara lee said...

more salad suggestions:

rocket, parmesan and pear salad with balsamic and sea salt. God yes.

i could go for trying that haloumi one, though. Yuuuum.

Obnoxious Owl said...

mmmmm haloumi. Yummo. I should post about salads more.

motel said...

beetroot, avo, feta, rocket....god i love salads. i dream about salads. i agree, you should post about salads more :D <3