Saturday, November 27, 2010

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway SPECIAL EDITION: You think you better than me?



YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you got more followers on TWITTER?
Look at your followers in comparison to the number of tweets you've tweeted you twat.  Also, the real boss is the person who has more followers in real life.  Beleeeeeeeee Dat.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you keep your mouth shut?  
Talking about people that talk about people means you talk about people.  Dust off that halo sweetheart, it's looking a bit tarnished.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you only buy vintage, eat organic and give 20 bucks a month to the orphan in Africa you saw on the telly?
Do you think the cocaine you shove up your nose is made in ethical factories and imported via the Virgin Mary?


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because I talk about SEX?
Sex is great. It's fun.  It's between adults...adults that have fun when having sex and share a bond in that enjoyment.  Sure, it may be better when two people are 'in love' - but what does that even mean? It is possible to be a sexual being and still keep your self respect and dignity...just choose the right partners, and keep your wits about you.  And don't kiss on the mouth.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... 'cause you famous?
So is Vanilla Ice.  Remember that.  And so is Fergie...and she was a meth head.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you're thinner than me?
I'll pay that, I'm more interesting than you.  so we're even.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... 'cause you're straight edge?
Well done mate, tell the Fun Police I said 'sup.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you have a little tinkle of a laugh?
MWAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.   HA.


YOU THINK YOU BETTER THAN ME ... because you're married, have a house/land package, a 4 wheel drive and a bun in the oven?
Sorry to hear you lost the war against maturity.  I'll be over here enjoying travelling, making money, having sex and just generally breathing the same oxygen as you.  I'm sorry about that. You just keep on keeping IKEA afloat ya hear?

To begin with, our perception of the world is deformed, incomplete. Then our memory is selective. Finally, writing transforms.

8 comments:

Ms Fitz said...

I love you

Obnoxious Owl said...

xxxx

Anonymous said...

Hello, I have been reading your blog and I have decided that it would be much less passive aggressive if you would please start to name your "friends" or whoever it is that you're talking about in each post. We are dying to know and I'm sure your "friends" are too.

Obnoxious Owl said...

Hmm. I take it I know you Ms/Mr Anon? Is it not passive aggressive to sign anonymously? Anyway..

I know hundreds and hundreds of people. I have over a thousand 'friend' on FB. I also am nearly 30 years old and spend most of my time on the internet. Therefore, I have a lot to be inspired by. Whether it be just by looking at my FB feed and seeing interactions, situations between people at parties, hearing tales of woe and happiness from friends about people they know and I dont...you know? Life!

Nothing in O.Owl is based on direct friendships. All of my friends in my tight group know me and know that if I were to have a problem with them I would hit them straight up. They all read O.Owl and would know if they were being used as inspiration. Sometimes a drama will take place in our crew and I will actually say, 'Dudes, I'm so gonna blog this' - it's a running joke.

Sure, some situations are based on personal experience, and others is just observation. FUCK, I say 'I don't use it anyway' because I am not claiming to be perfect.

So as much as whoever you are would like to see O O become a gossip column then you will be sadly disappointed.

If anything you read may hit a nerve it is probs because a) youmay have needed to hear it or b) we aren't that tight.

If I used this avenue to have beef with mates, then the blog is null and void, and goes against what I stand for.

Now I am sure you are a reasonable person, albeit slightly immature perhaps, I dunno. But this is not a witch hunt and it is just me throwing my opinion out there. Ironically, I am pretty private about my personal problems and so you think you may know what I may be on about, but you actually have no idea. You don't have to read it if you don't want to :)

BIG LOVE X

Community College said...

This thread is so gossip girl! LOVE IT! Keep shaking up the squares owlie.x

Obnoxious Owl said...

I'm keeping eyes peeled for death threats haha xx

motel said...

i love the obnoxious owl!!!

Obnoxious Owl said...

:) x