Thursday, January 14, 2010

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway HOMME Part 8


BOY: Will read the 'to do' list.
MAN: Knows what needs to be done.

BOY: Whining that you don't have a condom and claim that skin on skin is so much better.
MAN: On realising that you don't have a rubber you give your lady the head of her life, and she responds with immense gratitude.

BOY: Lusts.
MAN: Loves.

BOY: Realising that you like a girl, so you flirt with her friend to make her jealous.
MAN: Realising that you like a girl, so you pick up the phone (not text) and ask her out.

BOY: Plays house.
MAN: Builds homes.

BOY: Drinking any form of alcho pop or any spirit diluted with so much soft drink you cant even taste it.
MAN: Anything on the rocks, or just your standard lager.

BOY: Has more muscle.
MAN: Has more vitality.

BOY: Discussing in detail with the lads the day after what she got up to in the sack.
MAN: Keeping the lip zipped and messaging her and thanking her for an enjoyable evening. Whether you intend to see her again or not.

BOY: Drifts aimlessly.
MAN: Aims at a goal.

BOY: Quoting lines from 'Step Brothers'.
MAN: Quoting lines from 'Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels'

BOY: Displaying any form, however mild, of homophobia.
MAN: Being that sure of his sexuality that he is able to befriend and hang out with a homosexual male.
BOY: Disruptive.
MAN: Implements order.

BOY: Getting his woman to order for him and buy his underwear.
MAN: Taking control of ordering the wine and buying his own fucking underwear.

BOY: Won't raise his own children.
MAN: Will raise his own and somebody else's.

BOY: Glorifies his own efforts.
MAN: Celebrates results.

BOY: Fucks women.
MAN: Pleases women.

And that's all I have to say about that x


Savyra said...

Owl, you rock. You have earned your wise feathers.

Anonymous said...

love love LOVE this!! Going by this, my sig other is no doubt a man, yayyy - by the way Tammy, do you have a man or are you a sexy single owl haha? x

Obnoxious Owl said...

Neg on the fella bodykiss. I was engaged for many years though and have just dated and behaved shockingly for the last years. So plenty of inspo for the blog! But if you find a MAN that resembles Diplo, then please send him my way.
big kiss x

Cassandra Marie said...


Rebecca said...


Ms Fitz said...