Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Take my advice...I don't use it anyway HOMME Part 16


FOR BOYS ONLY - A BIT OF A SHOUT OUT


I always seem to be having bit of a go...so here's a bit of a 'thanks for that' - this is for the fellas who know what they are doing....x


THANK YOU FOR KNOWING THE RIGHT INTENSITY IN WHICH TO SQUEEZE OUR NIPPLES - There is a fine line between pain and pleasure and you totally get it. We heart you.

THANK YOU FOR NOT OVER GROOMING - You understand that you only basically need to smell nice and to be dressed in such a way that is not contrived and your clothes are clean. You are so hot.

THANK YOU FOR PRETENDING NOT TO NOTICE OUR FANNY FARTS - You totes understand that our vagina's are like little caves and can trap air, so when something is plunged into them it causes the air to escape. You are mature enough to know it's not real and you are gentleman enough to ignore it. Thank you for not being a dick!

THANK YOU FOR NOT BEING A PUSSY - Those of you that know how to be a MAN without being a neanderthal are most appreciated. Just letting you know.

THANK YOU FOR BEING SENSITIVE TO THE FACT THAT WHEN ANOTHER GIRL COPIES OUR STYLE IT PISSES US OFF - We already know it's petty...and you understand that girl politics is best left to girls. Look at you being all understanding and shit...naww :)

THANK YOU FOR SPITTING ON OUR AREA WHEN WE ARE NO LONGER...UM, MOIST - Fuck you're hot.

THANK YOU FOR NOT LIKING STUPID MUSIC SUCH AS 'ART VS SCIENCE' - We adore you.

THANK YOU FOR TUGGING OUR HAIR BACK WITH THE RIGHT COMBINATION OF STRENGTH AND GENTLENESS - Of course we'll take it in the bum!

THANK YOU FOR BRUSHING YOUR TEETH - You have no idea what we have to put up with usually.

THANK YOU FOR REPLYING TO OUR TEXT MESSAGES WITHOUT MAKING US FEEL LIKE WE ARE NAGGING BITCHES - Your mama taught you right.

THANK YOU FOR KNOWING WHEN WE WANT TO BE RAVISHED LIKE A DIRTY WENCH, AND WHEN A SOFT LITTLE FUCK WILL DO - You say all the right things...

THANK YOU FOR BEING SO DELICIOUS X

8 comments:

Sarah Jane said...

and thank you tammy croucher for being you

Obnoxious Owl said...

:) xx

Greta said...

Why don't you like Art vs. Science?

jp said...

In the beginning there was a fountain
But it wasn't just any fountain
It was a magic fountain............

Obnoxious Owl said...

Greta...really?
JP...pen?

xx

Greta said...

...yes

Community College said...

Don't be giving dudes the idea we like it in the ass Tammy! Porn is bad enough but when girls say they like it in real life. Well... what DEFENCE DO I HAVE???! DO NOT WANT!!!

Obnoxious Owl said...

Take it like a man Alex! haha xx